We often get asked if the FORT in our name is an acronym. We may have a slight geeky obsession with acronyms, so…Yes! FORT stands for Family Oriented Recreation and Therapy. This reflects the two main tracks of our services: Recreation experiences, and Therapeutic mental health services. When we say “Family Oriented” we are reinforcing both our family friendliness and the philosophy that all individuals exist within systems or communities integrated with their health and well being.
Our mission is to foster empowerment and connection through adventure, recreation, and therapy. For a client seeking mental health services, this means evidence based methods of treatment along with experiential options to enhance and deepen their process. Clients are empowered to choose their level and type of engagement, including traditional in-office counseling, adventure therapy (indoor or outdoor), and art therapy.
Learn more about our Therapists below:
Beth Venable, MS, LPC/I – Upstate FORT Founder and Therapist
Beth is passionate about serving youth, adolescents, adults, couples and families who are struggling with difficult adjustments, mood disorders, anxiety, grief, developmental delays, and conflict. These issues may be rooted in more complex mental health issues, in life transitions / experiences, or family traumas. Her personality is lighthearted and open. She enjoys working with diverse clients.
Beth’s training includes a specialization in couple and family counseling, as well as specific skills and methods to best support children and adolescents. Several years as a parent coach and educator support and inform her perspective. She uses art and play based methods in evaluative ways.
Working in residential treatment settings for over ten years introduced Beth to the power of using experiences and adventure in treatment planning and delivery. After initial intake, and pending safety, clients are offered adventure based counseling alternatives in her practice.
Nicole Grimm, MA, LPC – Therapist
Nicole is a Licensed Professional Counselor and art therapist. Nicole has over ten years experience providing evidence-based psychotherapeutic interventions, including art therapy, to both children and adults.
Nicole creates a safe, welcoming environment that will enable you to create positive change in your life, family and community. She often uses art therapy to help generate awareness, mindfulness and well-being. Through the process of creating art in therapy, skills linked to courage and taking action are also practiced and refined.
As some people are possibly less suited for art therapy, she also uses other techniques as well, such as cognitive behavioral and acceptance and commitment therapy.
Nicole works with individuals and couples dealing with depression, anxiety, trauma, career choices, student adjustment, academic challenges, parenting struggles and relationship problems. Whatever the concern, Nicole will be passionate about helping you live a full and dynamic life.
The center of a bike’s wheel, where it attaches to the frame is known as the “hub.” Spreading out from this hub are a series of thin metal rods known as the “spokes.” The spokes serve as connection points to the outer rim of the wheel which connects to the tire. Aside from being an excellent placement for playing cards or colorful beads, the spokes keep the wheel true to its shape and reinforce its strength, while transferring force outward from the hub. Lose a few spokes and you are likely to be riding something that begins to resemble an amoeba instead of a perfect circle, and certainly not able to create momentum.
Here at Upstate FORT (Family Oriented Resources and Therapy) we really like to ride bikes. But, that is not the reason our logo references the wheel of a bike. Look closely and you will see the “hub” of our wheel is a heart. At the center of everything we do is compassionate regard for the person, family, or couple we have the privilege to serve. We also hope this powerful little heart serves as a reminder to find the most loving voice possible at the center of our being for ourselves and those we are connected to. When a client comes into our office we aim to become one of their spokes, helping them to feel strong and true.
One of the patterns I have noticed over the years is the number of people I meet on wheels with one or two spokes. Their heart hubs are feeling isolated and disconnected from others. They are tired of carrying too much load in one or two areas. Friends and family may be unaware of their struggles, most often because they have chosen to maintain the illusion they are not struggling out of embarrassment or the desire to avoid creating inconvenience for others.
Our culture celebrates individualism and independence, even though any walk through nature, creative collaboration, or service opportunity reminds us of the value diversity and interdependence bring to our lives and community. The instinct when things get hard is to isolate or draw in, to remove support, to downsize the number of spokes.
What if, when things got hard, we added spokes? And what if we made sure those spokes were rooted in our most loving thoughts?
Spokes might look like: asking a friend to go for coffee or a run; spending ten minutes a day to simply sit, breathe, and tune into the heart of the matter; hiring a coach or helper; asking for help from a friend, neighbor, or parent; volunteering for something where we can make a difference; or organizing a community supper one night a week with friends.
Hub and Spokes. Coming from the heart, allowing vulnerability to be seen, creating interdependence and transferring the power of community so that we all have an easier time staying strong and true.
In his book Brainstorm, Dr. Dan Siegel talks describes adolescence as a time to be cultivated well. But, parenting an adolescent is hard, y’all! Really hard. They often leave parents asking which kid is real. The one who still wants a cuddle, or the one who brushes you off? The one who seeks your advice, or the one who yells that you can’t possibly understand?
The gifts of adolescence, as Dr. Siegel describes them, are novelty seeking, social engagement, increased emotional intensity, and creative exploration. Each of these has its upsides and downsides. It is easy to forget the upsides when adolescent behaviors are reckless, rude, or frightening. Parenting an adolescent is hard, but being one is ten times harder. When teens were asked for a word to describe adolescence, Siegel notes, their responses were: isolated, crazed, confused, a mess, alone, terrified, wild, out of control, lost, seeking, and frightened.
Adolescents benefit greatly from being around adults who are more interested in their cultivation than controlling their behavior. The following are some questions to consider when parenting, coaching, or mentoring the awesome adolescents in your life.
For Novelty Seeking:
What activities seem exciting and thrilling to you? What do you see friends doing that you think you might want to try, but you’re not sure how to make it safe?
For Social Engagement:
Which people make you feel your best, and which people make you feel less?
Who can you be authentic with?
For Increased Emotional Intensity:
What do you feel passionately curious about?
For Creative Exploration:
What problems in the world do you think you are uniquely suited to solve?
Think about the last time you were face to face with a child or teen overwhelmed by emotion. For that matter, think about the last time you might have felt that way. What did it take for the turbulent seas of emotion to become calm again, enough to think clearly and move forward? This transition is heavily influenced by time and maturity, but it is also a skill that can be developed. This is especially important to consider as a parent, and the more tools to try the better!
When I began working in residential treatment, and long before I was a parent myself, I would frequently make the mistake of trying to talk or process with a client overwhelmed by emotion. Far from being helpful, this often escalated their emotions further. Over time I learned the intervention that would have the most impact would come after emotions had calmed and rational thought had resumed.
Now, as a therapist and a parent, I collect emotional regulation skills and exercises like the precious jewels they are. The list below just scratches the surface and has been contributed to by teachers, mentors, and colleagues who have been generous with their knowledge like Life Adventures Counseling in Seminole, FL.
One of the most powerful tools for emotional regulation bears a special mention: time spent in the outdoors. This doesn’t have to be complex or related to a fitness goal. Simply being in nature soothes the frayed ends of our emotions and allows us to find a healthy rhythm again. Can’t go outside? Bring nature inside with sound, plants, images, and natural objects.
Everyone is different, so you may need to try more than one of these skills to discover which ones work best for you or your family:
I would love to hear more ideas! Send them my way and I will add them to the list (firstname.lastname@example.org).
We all want to have awesome conversations with our kids. The kinds of conversations that invite us to learn about their hopes, passions, and fears. Sweet, tender moments when we have a chance to relate to the people they are becoming and share a bit of what we have learned. As our kids enter the tween years the once delightful little kid conversations give way to monosyllabic grunts and whole sentences seemingly void of consonants. Tragically, this is happening just when kids are entering adolescence and becoming passionate, original thinkers with really incredible insights and innovations to share.
When discussions of brain development come up, you often hear the phrase, “What fires together wires together.” Learning to use open ended questions and creating routines that facilitate conversation certainly allow for better discussions and relationships. The added brain-development bonus is that these kinds of conversations also help wire the brain for more insightful and empathetic observations. Win win! It doesn’t have to be verbal. Passing notes, a kitchen chalkboard, and journals all support the same development of insight and lead to more verbalization when the time is right.
Here’s a list of questions to experiment with. You can try these on for size or play with phrases like, “Tell me more about that…,” or, “I’m curious what you think about…” Also, side by side moments like a car ride are often better opportunities than a face to face conversation.
There are only two tried and true rules to follow: avoid questions that can have one word (or grunted) answers; and avoid the word “why,” which tends to feel like a challenge or conflict.